There is still hope: Paris back in jail

Well, it looks like there's still some hope left for America because Paris Hilton is back in jail. But then again, this pathetic ordeal has also been the top story on multiple newscasts around the country.

So the net result is that Paris Hilton continues to contribute to America's decline as a global superpower. Good going Paris. If I have to move to China in 5 years to find a job I'm totally blaming you.