Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Hybrid Drivers

When you see someone driving one of those new hybrid cars - isn't hard to imagine them being an asshole? Somehow, just being the owner of an environmentally friendly vehicle gives the driver instant credibility. After all, how could someone who's a guardian of mother-earth possibly be bad?

Trust me, it's possible. My buddy got cut off by a Prius the other day - but ultimately felt compelled to forgive the driver because of the hybrid car credibility factor. Which is totally crap. Because while it's be proven that 100% of Hummer drivers are indeed douchebags, it hasn't been proven that 100% of hybrid drivers aren't. And even if it's just 1%, that's still 1 out of 100 hybrid drivers that deserves a honk. Or a drive-by middle finger. Or getting followed home and having their house burned down.

So to all you Prius owners out there - don't think that just because you drive a hybrid car, you can get away with driving like an Asian woman. Unless you actually are an Asian woman. Because we've already learned to get out of your way.


At 1:35 PM, Anonymous Chanakin said...

Why do hybrid cars have to look like cockroaches?

At 2:51 PM, Blogger D to tha L I C T said...

Because they'll be the only cars on the road when the gas price apocalypse happens?

Okay, that was bad.

At 3:47 PM, Anonymous proudmary said...

You raise an excellent point. This is like die-hard born-again christians in the south... they spread vicious gossip about their neighbors, hate "the coloreds" on the wrong side of the tracks, and wouldn't dream of befriending someone in any way different... yet they get the God Factor on their side every sunday, 'cause they get themselves to Revival.
can i get uh 'amen'...?

At 4:01 PM, Blogger Cibbuano said...

re: asian women driving

aren't you asian? That means, if you have a kid, and it's a girl, there's a good chance that you'll be the father of a female asian driver

You'll burn up in retributionary rage...

At 7:17 PM, Blogger SadieMBeagle said... ironic fact not lost on our lazy friend, I'm sure...

At 3:45 PM, Anonymous Hermosa Beach Drunks said...

Hey, I was said friend. I'm happy to hear that my story has been memorialized on the interweb.

At 1:30 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know, the episode of South Park that covered this subject called the Prius by a wholly appropriate moniker:

the Pious

...and the drivers who drive these cars don't do much to make my change my mind about this due to how uppity they seem to be.

Good for you, buddy. You are using less gas. how 'bout just not driving? My feet use up NO gas. :)


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