Wednesday, April 26, 2006

Shakira's Hips

Shakira has nice hips. And apparently, they don't lie. Her latest single "Hips Don'’t Lie" has been steadily climbing the Billboard chart for the past 5 weeks.

But it's really a stupid song if you think about it. Because of course her hips don't lie. My hips have never spoken to me, let alone lie to me. In fact, I don't think anybody's hips are capable of falsehood. So why does she need to sing a song to point that out?

Probably because she has nice hips and she wants to world to know by singing about them. I get it Shakira - you've got nice hips. Really nice. Even if they were somehow lying, I'd forgive them. But it's just plain lazy to sing about something that so obviously describes your best feature. I don‚’t hear Dolly Parton singing “"My Boobs are Huge", or Kylie Minogue singing "My Ass is Tight", or Christina Aguilera singing "I'm a Dirty Whore".

If you want to impress us, sing about something we don't know - something that reveals your inner vulnerabilities and insecuritiess to make you more relatable to regular people. Something like: "I Look Bad in the Morning", or "My Shit Stinks Too".


At 12:46 PM, Anonymous sangster said...

didn't christina indeed have a song called "i'm a dirty whore" out?

At 1:09 PM, Anonymous Chanakin said...

Nice cover. Too bad Eve didn't have an oral fixation.

She had an eating disorder.

At 1:17 PM, Anonymous Hermosa Beach Drunks said...

I think she means that women can't really fake their hips. Women can wear lots of different pieces of clothing and undergarments that increase or reduce the sizes of their chests, waists, butts and other body parts. Hips on other other hand can't really be faked.
That said, (as you pointed out) Shakira is gloating about her AMAZING hips. It would be like Jennifer Lopez singing "Extremely Attractive Women Need Neither Talent nor Creativity" or Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt singing a duet of "Beautiful People Make Beautiful Kids (P.S. Your Kids Are Ugly)".

At 11:35 PM, Blogger Cibbuano said...

Shakira's hips lied to me... I was lost in Kentucky, and they said there was a McDonalds around the corner - and there wasn't!

At 3:50 PM, Blogger ProudMary said...

Y'know... I'm so dumb, I actually thought this song was saying "if the sex is good, who cares about the rest". Seriously. 'Cause hips don't lie. They know what's good for you. You tell 'em, Shakira.

At 8:22 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

aww maddox is a lil cutie! he aint ugly

At 9:58 AM, Blogger Where Productivity Goes to Die said...

Christina Aguilera did have a song called "I'm a dirty whore" - only she pronounced it "dirty" and wore chaps.


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