St. Patrick's Day

Okay - so why am I talking about St. Patrick's Day when it's still two days away? Because I'm going out of town and won't be posting until next week - but the Irish holiday is still worth talking about. In a strange way, I'm actually being both lazy and proactive at the same time - which is just CRAZY.

And to continue my crazy paradoxical ways, I will denote the reasons why St. Patrick's Day is lazy through a numbered list. Because a numbered list is both lazy and helpful at clarifying topics.

Okay - 8 reasons why St. Patrick's Day is lazy:

1. Only one color is involved: Green. Halloween has two colors: Orange and Black. Christmas has three: Red, Green and White. Gay and Lesbian Day has the ENTIRE rainbow.


2. Corned beef and cabbage is easier to prepare than toast.


3. Unlike most holidays, relatives aren't usually involved.


4. Lucky Charms cereal instills Irish symbolism in the impressionable minds of children at an early age. Thus, less marketing and promotion for St. Patrick's Day is required as they get older. This hasn't been "scientifically" proven yet, but I'm working on it.
   


5. It's easy to revert back to college behavior.


6. Simply putting green food coloring in beer will elicit amazement from the drinker.


7. "Leprechaun" is easy to spell.


8. The entire holiday is based off of Irish stereotypes. Imagine if everyone was socially awkward and did calculus problems on Chinese New Year.