Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Inventor of the Futon

I hate futons. They suck as couches and they suck as beds - which is a whole lot of sucking. But thanks to college kids and people who lack taste - futons are somehow way more popular than they deserve to be.

On every futon that I've ever sat on - I'm either sitting up so straight that it looks like I've got a broomstick up my ass, or slouched down so low that my nose is 2-inches away from my belly six-pack abs. And maybe I'm just picky, but when I sleep, I prefer my bed to be flat and not have a large, deep trench running down the middle. They also look stupid because no matter how many cushions you pile on - you still can't hide the fact that it's a dumb-looking futon. (see photo)

And how about the genius inventor of this piece-of-crap furniture that has made its way into millions of homes across America? I bet he got his inspiration from a hot dog bun.


At 12:01 PM, Anonymous Hermosa Beach Drunks said...

Wasn't the futon invented in Asia by your lazy ilk?

At 6:42 PM, Blogger SadieMBeagle said...

I'll say you're a lazy asian. Only one post today? C'mon!

At 10:37 AM, Anonymous Sangster said...

google adsense must've crawled this post only... all your ad are about your favorite things in the world... FUTONS!!!

At 12:17 PM, Blogger Chase said...

I just stopped in on this post to say the same thing sangster did...the AdSense futon ad is PRICELESS!! haha!!


Ain't irony great?

*runs to check what AdSense put on my page today...*

At 9:12 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I bought a futon two years ago.

IT SUCKS. I'm sick of rolling around in my "trench".

Who the hell wants to have to flip their mattress every 6 weeks?

I tried to do this and ended up at my Osteopath's office.

So much for saving money buying this instead of a NORMAL bed.

At 2:20 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I HATE FUTONS EQUALLY OR GREATER THAN YOU DO. I have had to sleep on one from august of 2008 to may of 2009 and in that period I have developed spinal problems, depression, and the futon was cheap and it broke and I had to pay to fix it for my landlord. FUCKING FUTONS


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